StarliteTheLoyal's Blog
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4/21/08 0 CommentsTOTAL Embarasment to ALL LOYALS!!!
Well, I found out that I am pregnant on March.5th 08.. I am 14 weeks and 2 days today.. Me and the babys daddy have been together since Jan.24th,2007. I lived in Florida when I first met him and we got together.. Then I had to move to Oklahoma because of family stuff.. however me and the babys daddy love eachother VERY much and decided to stay together.. so we have flew back and forth to see eachother ALOT.. I got pregnant sometime between Jan.23-27th, 2008 because that was the time frame I went to go see him then afterwards found out I was pregnant.. Anyways, the babys daddy is going to move up here so we can be together and we will be getting married in July.. the baby is due Oct.18,2008. I am SCARED about this more then anything in my life! Pregnancy is NOT where I pictured myself right now in my life..
And the thing is Criss Angel means MORE to me then Almost ANYTHING! He has helped me through SOOOOOOO Much in my life and my ULTIMATE GOAL in life is to meet him!
I had planned on going to his big show at the Luxor, before fate threw me this pregnancy thing.. And I have tried SOOOOO hard to always keep the faith that one day I would meet him..
But as hard as ive tried it just seems like I have LOST ALL hope!
I mean I dont have hardly any money to my name now, and ive ALWAYS lived a LONG way from Criss..So I have never gotten the chance to meet him and tell him Thank You for everything he dosent know he has done for me.. for helping me truley believe that life can go on after something TERRIBLE and life shattering happens.., and now it just seems to me like im NEVER going to get that chance..
And ive been sooo discouraged and depressed about it that I just feel like a total embarasment to all loyals.. I mean I have loved Criss and EVERYTHING he has stood for, for the longest time.. but ive never got the chance to meet him or get anywhere close to him or even have him know that I exist..not that I matter at all, but now I just feel like all hope is lost and I never will get that chance..
SO for this loyal the one thing I have wanted more then anything in life is ruined because of pregnancy, but its such a mixed emotion because I really am TRYING to be happy about this whole pregnancy thing... but its like every time I see even a picture of Criss I just feel like im going to BREAK DOWN in TEARS!!!
So one unplanned child (Check) and ONE Life Long Dream Officially SHATTERED! (Check)
Call it throwing a pitty party if u wish, but I really just feel like Crawling under a Rock FOREVER!
Thanks for reading this little rant,
*Starlite - The Loyal
myspace.com/tourmented_byond
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2/26/08 0 CommentsHello Loyals!
Just renewed my subscription for this site for another WONDERFUL year!!!
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7/8/07 2 CommentsHello.
Random :P
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5/17/07 3 CommentsAggravated...
Ok all, so I finally got things ok in my life right now, I have a good job, an AWESOME boyfriend, and am saving up money to go see Criss.. but OMG GRRRRR! It feels like EVERYTHING is working against me.. Its like EVERYTIME I turn aroudn something requires money... at this rate I feel like ill never get to see Criss... :(
Its SOOOOO Discouraging.
I got my air conditioner fixed in my car or at least I thought I did but then it broke down right after that.. so there went $100 down the drain for no reason at all.. luckily they refunded it for me though..
But now I found out whats ACTUALLY wrong with the air conditioner and it turns out I have to go buy a new cair conditioner for my car and have it put it which is like $600. So I just said FORGET it I will go without freaking air conditioning then!!! At Least until I get back from going to see Criss..
OMG Im just SOOOOOOOOO Aggravated!!! I just want the ENTIRE world to just LEAVE MY MONEY ALONE! lol.. I know This might sound like a little immature whinning but im SOOOO Far away from Criss And I want more then anything in the world to see him right now, sooo.. yea I am getting REALLY PISD!
ttyl, Much Loyal Love
*Starlite - The Loyal
P.s. Hopefully next time I Update everyone it will be with better news and ill be in a better mood. Sorry about this everyone.. but I just NEEDED to VENT!!! I think it helped alittle.
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3/31/07 6 CommentsAnother Update
Hey all, its me again *Starlite - The Loyal, Just wanted to update everyone... I did quit the telemarketing job I had, it wasnt as good as they claimed it would be and I HATED Driving at nights.. I cant see at night at all driving, so it was kinda dangerous.
Anyways, I Did Find a new job though, I start work at SEARS tonight but normally the manager said I will be working during the days thank goodness. Smiles
And I am going to save up as much money from there as possible.
Also, I do take my CNA test NEXT Saturday and im SUPER Excited about that.. Not sure If I will pass or not, but im hoping for the best. Either way I have a job now, but if I pass that Test this saturday I might end up JUGGELING 2 jobs.. but hey.. more money for me right ??? lol Smiles
Im SUPER EXCITED, Now that I have a job (maybe 2) I REALLY REALLY REALLY Feel like my life is just getting started Smiles
anyways yea.. thats pretty much all for now, Cant wait for June to see the premier of Season 3.
Much Loyal Love and thanks for reading my Blog,
*Starlite - The Loyal
